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The Past

Sunday, March 28, 2004
-*unexpected dustings*-

Sam died today.

Sam the dog. He was attacked by the pitbull nextdoor, like Hershey was about 2 months ago. Sam didn't survive the attack, though. I'm sure he went down with a fight. Sam was murdered. He received 12 puncture wounds throughout his body as well as a torn esophagus and a broken skullcap. Sam didn't have a chance. Sam was mortal but he fought like a savior because that is what he knew he could do for us.

Maybe Sam wasn't the best dog, but he did not deserve this.

I wanted to post this for all those friends, old and new, who may have known Sammi for who he really was.

Sam was loyal.
He was a little psychotic, but he was a good dog. He was loyal to grandma and my mom. Although he didn't get along with my dad at any point in time, he stopped biting my dad. Something happened to Sam at some point two years ago. He realized the meaning of respect. He ceased biting my dad and saw that living under someone's roof demanded a certain amount of respect from him toward his owners.

Sam was understanding.
Sam was faithful to Golden. Wherever Golden trod, Sam was right behind him, watching him, licking him on the face, telling him things to dog-speak that only he and Old One-eye could understand. Somehow, they got along and whatever magic it was that Sam had, he used it for good.

Sam was silly.
Sometimes Sam would feel like he wasn't loved, and all he wanted so much in life was to be loved by others even though he was different. Just because he wasn't a cocker spaniel in the mad house we call our home, he still wanted attention. Sam would jump up on your lap and bury his nose into your crotch and stay there no matter how much you pet him, nudged him away, or kissed his head. He learned to love people and we learned to love him.

Sam was strong.
I know he didn't go down without a fight. Sam was protective of us and he would do the best he could to save us if only he had the chance. He learned this from Golden who was the Protector of our home. You stepped up when the former Protector could no longer do the duties he swore to do for our family. But we did not blame him, for we knew that you could the one to replace him and do just as good a job because you felt with your heart and weren't selfish.

So this post is for Sam, the Leader, the Truth, and the Lost.

Sam, I wished I had spent more time with you before you left. I hurt badly inside and I can't deal with losing you. I have lost so much in recent years and I never expected to lose you while I was away. I loved you Sam even though we didn't see eye-to-eye on things when Beba was out of the house. I'm sorry I couldn't be there to comfort you when you died. Sam, these tears are for you tonight. I am crying because I have lost someone close, someone I really did like more than I showed and someday maybe I'll realize that only pain comes from losing someone you really cared about and loved but never took the time to tell them as much. Goodnight Sam. Maybe I'm not Christian anymore, nor believe in God, but if it's all true, then may God accept you with open arms into that large field where doggies run around in heaven all day, free to roam and explore as they please, much like you did irl.

Sammi-kins Ronda (1992-2004)

We loved you Sam. We hope to see you in the next life, be there another.

Grey (1:17 AM)

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